


Carry That Weight

by caramelkaren



Category: Cabin Pressure
Genre: M/M, Mentions of Suicide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-02-26
Updated: 2013-02-26
Packaged: 2017-12-03 15:59:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 571
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/700026
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/caramelkaren/pseuds/caramelkaren
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The night Martin killed himself, he never thought he'd see Arthur again.  Turns out he was sorely mistaken...</p>
            </blockquote>





	Carry That Weight

**Author's Note:**

> Written for Cabin Crew Riot Two! Prompt #6: First, Last, Worst, Best, Never (Never)
> 
> This was actually a collaboration with my fellow Skipthur shipper MJ. She was in the process of drawing some artwork as a sort of sequel to a fic she'd written earlier, and she didn't think there'd be enough time to get the complimentary fic done. So really, she gave me the basic outline, I put it into prose. If she has an ao3 account (I never did ask) I'll add her as a co-author for that very reason. ;) Even though it's a sequel, I think you can still read this as is. And ignore the crappy title, it wasn't like she provided one herself, and I save all my fics with titles, and this is what I used.

If Martin would've known committing suicide would only lead to him having to live on as a ghost, he would've never bothered. At least he could still fly if he were still alive. Fly badly of course, he never did deserve to be a pilot, but it was flying nonetheless. But no. Apparently the punishment for acting upon such a sin was that you would be stuck to haunt the one person who suffered the most from your selfish actions until he or she passed away as well.

In Martin's case, this meant he was tethered onto Arthur's life.

Oh, Arthur...Martin had hoped against hope that maybe he wouldn't take it too bad, that he'd soon snap back into the steward everyone knew him as, with a grin on his face and a bounce in his step. That's what he normally did once the dark times passed. But Martin had to watch as Arthur was stuck at home, shattered. It wasn't as if he could fly on G-ERTI to distract him. Martin had barely considered this consequence when he pulled the trigger, but without him not being paid to fly for MJN, they had to fold. So in one swoop, Martin had managed to take away the two things Arthur loved most in life, more than Toblerones, polar bears, otters, camel camels and apple tossing combined.

Martin really wanted to come out from hiding away. He knew that as a part of his curse only Arthur would ever be able to see him. To everyone else the only sense he might even be present would be a small breeze as he moved past them. To the rest of the world, he was invisible. And Martin really, really never wanted to be seen. He was never supposed to have to face him again. To have to look into those warm eyes and be face to face with the fact that he just did not deserve someone as beautiful as Arthur was, both inside and out. Or, if he slipped up trying to be hidden, to look into those eyes and see the bitter disappointment he'd have for his Skip, leaving him all alone.

But just how long was Arthur going to live? What if it was for another 50 years? Could he honestly go that long without having to face him? He didn't know.

When he shot himself that night, he seriously believed that it would be for the better. Even for Arthur. Maybe he'd actually find someone who was just as brilliant to equal him. But maybe he judged the outcome wrong...

The only time Martin was able to leave his hiding place and roam freely was at night when Arthur was sound asleep. He'd actually forgotten how precious the man was when in such a peaceful state, so different from the excitable person he usually was. To believe he'd come that close to never being able to see this again.

As weeks turned into months, Martin was beginning to question whether or not it was worth it in the end. Arthur was finally managing to gain a lot of his old happiness, but it just wasn't the same spark he once had. And it was all his fault. Heh, even in death he was a failure. Was he seriously starting to wish he never killed himself? Wasn't it for the better that he did? He didn't even know anymore.


End file.
